Thursday, October 24, 2013

Beauty from Ashes...but for now Mostly Ashes


I’ve always thought that I was a relatively genuine and real person. Lately I’ve been finding out rather quickly that that is not necessarily true. I’m pretty good at putting up a façade. These past couple of weeks I’ve been struggling with this and working on setting a goal for change. My goal that I want to be working towards is one of freedom from pretense, the ability to sit in my brokenness and not feel the need to hide it. What I’ve found to be incredible is how much grace I can have towards everyone in the world but myself. I am so ready to forgive everyone and love everyone, but the minute I fail to be perfect, I beat myself up. As Christians, we are raised to be our best and that’s what we should be. But we need to be teaching each other and ourselves what it looks like to have grace for ourselves and for others in the church. How can we understand God’s grace fully when our ideas of grace are so flawed? The idea behind this post is the thought that I want to be free to be broken. But that can’t happen without grace, for myself and from others. First comes grace, then comes freedom, and then brokenness can be accepted and acceptable.

You see this has been a rough year for me. It’s been a really incredible year and I never want to minimize the many blessings that I’ve received this year. But that’s not what this is about. This is about the brokenness that this year has brought. I’ve made some bad decisions. My heart has often and is still often not in the right place. I’ve deeply hurt some people that I really love and been hurt deeply as well. I’ve lost a best friend who I miss a lot and it was because of my selfishness that the friendship fell apart. I left a lot of close friends and family members in Wheaton to move to Denver. There have been some hard transitions and some growth experiences brought on by my own decisions. My heart feels a little torn apart at the moment. And coming to seminary I didn’t let my heart stay that way. I felt the need to cover up the brokenness, to hide all this crap under the carpet, to look like I had it all put together. Because if you’re going to seminary, you do right? It’s funny. My group therapy class (which is pretty much learning group therapy by being in group therapy) talked last week about the fact that since we’ve all been at seminary God’s been breaking each of us down like crazy. One girl said, “It’s like you give all your money to the seminary and God’s like, ‘Oooh yay! Let’s do this!’” Yet you never see this because everyone is afraid to show that they are not perfectly living for Christ wholeheartedly because the church expects these seminarians to be the best Christians imaginable. And while there is a legitimate conversation to be had about leadership in the faith, that’s not what this blog is about nor what I feel needs to be my focus at the moment.

It’s interesting- when I’m struggling tends to be when my face breaks out pretty bad. So these past couple months I’ve woken up every morning and put on the cover up because I would hate for people to see the zits on my face. That’s the picture God used to wake me up my fakeness. One morning He just said, “Look at the face you put on every morning. Forget it. Just be real.” I’m tired of being fake. My cry is this: “Oh love that will not let me go, I rest my weary soul in Thee!” And there I stop because for now that’s as far as I can get in that song. My soul is weary. So now, in this weariness, I’m trying to figure out what the heck it means to be real and live vulnerably and honestly in the brokenness. In my CE classes we talked about it a lot. To quote one of the wisest men I know, I am living in the tension. I have so much hope and positivity and I trust that healing will come. But in this moment, I want to be real while not losing that positivity that is central to me. And I have absolutely no idea what that means or what that looks like. But I just want you all to know that I do not have it all put together. I am at seminary and I am hoping to spend my life doing missions. But that will never mean that I have it all put together. Because that’s not what life is about. The point is not that I’ll follow Him perfectly, but that I’ll follow Him no matter what. We have these high expectations for our pastors and people in ministry. We expect them to be better than us. But the thing is they are just as human as us. And we should never ever expect perfection or anything like it from them. Life is about the journey of growth for everyone. And this journey is not a straight line, but a cycle. We think we’ve dealt with things, but somewhere down the road they come back in a new way. Because as long as we live on earth sin and temptation will never be gone from us. We will never fully overcome them. Even as pastors and missionaries. But praise the Lord that our hope is not in our ability to overcome them and to “succeed” in life, but in the fact that Jesus already overcame and is our salvation and only hope.

So the hope I will cling to until more healing comes is this: “Here I raise my Ebenezer, hither by Thy help I’ve come. And I hope by Thy good pleasure safely to arrive at home.” I am clinging to the testimony that God has brought me this far and has carried me in His love. And I know He will bring me safely home one day. And until then He is with me always no matter what storms I walk through. So as I said at the beginning of this semester:

Jesus draw me ever nearer as I labor through the storm. You have called me to this passage and I’ll follow though I’m worn. May this journey bring a blessing, may I rise on wings of faith. And at the end of my heart’s testing with your likeness let me wake. Jesus, guide me through the tempest; keep my spirit staid and sure. When the midnight meets the morning, let me love you even more. May this journey bring a blessing. May I rise on wings of faith; and at the end of my heart's testing, with your likeness let me wake. Let the treasures of the trial form within me as I go; and at the end of this long passage let me leave them at your throne. May this journey bring a blessing. May I rise on wings of faith; and at the end of my heart's testing, with your likeness let me wake.

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